Random thoughts for the day.

Top 10 (completely random) things from Round 1

1. Watching San Jose, yet again, crap out in the playoffs. Seriously, who didn't see that one coming this year.
   
2. John Tortorella loses mind... again.
   
3. Sean Avery is an idiot... again.
   
4. Detroit Red Wings and Boston Bruins are very very scary good.
   
5. learning that Adam Burrish was a guest security guard on Jerry Springer. Insert own joke here.
   
6. Maybe the kids are alright. One of the youngest team in the NHL with an average age of 26.8, the Chicago Blackhawks pick off the Calgary Flames and made it look damn easy.
7. Alexander Ovechkin actually undressed several New York Rangers. No.... literally. It was a sexy time.
8. Carolina Hurricanes score with seconds left in game 7 to take the series. Someone kick Martin Broduer please.
9. Because of said late third period goal... Washington plays Pittsburgh in Round 2. I think Washington Coach Bruce Boudreau said it best... "we're playing Pittsburgh, welcome to the circus."
   
10. Does this mean Eric Staal is good again?
    

There's the old Torts we all knew and loved.

throwing shit at fans... playing "next question" with real reporters.... distracting his team into blowing a series against Washington....

But the weird thing is... he apologized.

"It was a bad mistake and I regret it," said John Tortorella. "I put the Ranger organization in an embarrassing situation and I'm embarrassed by it."

The old Torts woulda said "eff it! that fan is a moron and I wish i gotta hold of him like that time the fan fell into the box with Tie Domi. I woulda effed him right up."

tsk tsk Torts. TSN made you soft. You've lost your touch.


Update — Epic Beard Battle.

Epic = Saddest

May 1 morning skate: Day 17

May 2nd Post-game: Day 18

Maurice fired.

Paul maurice was fired as head coach by the Maple Leafs today.

Did I just type that? Yes I did. seriously?! Ok I just checked again, there's a picture, it must be true. Ok, I know the team underachieved (which is ironically an understatement). But it's not exactly like this is a new thing. The leafs do that. They underachieve, it's what they do. They enjoy being mediocre, what else would Michael Landsberg talk about if they weren't mediocre? It's not Maurice's fault they're too busy out there taking naked pictures of themselves. (Sorry, I know that was low... but I just cannot help it.)

On a (semi) serious note, I'm not sure if firing Maurice was the best call. Maurice cannot help that his team can never be rebuilt due to the fact that any player of value is locked into a no-trade clause (there is apparently a high rate of dementia among the Toronto players). And he managed to handle the Toronto media without looking like John Tortorella. And really, the Toronto media is a bit more...(pesky, annoying, obnoxious? choose one.)...than the Tampa Bay media. Speaking of John Tortorella, why does he have a job? The 2007-08 Tampa Bay Lightening was probably the biggest underachiever since Alexandre Daigle, and yet not only does he have a job, he is the head coach of the USA hockey team at the World Championships. My final question is, how do you get fired by an interim general manager? It's so mind-boggling. Listen folks I have the solution. It's pretty simple. It'll solve all of the problems. Make Mats Sundin the General Manager, send all the rest of the Leafs down to the AHL. Bring up the Marlies in their entirety. Dig up Bill Barilko. Simple.

In summary,
- Maurice firing bad idea
- Tortorella having job is shocking
- not as shocking as a naked Jiri Tlusty
- real hockey resumes tonight (Dallas and Detroit)
- **edit** hockey does NOT resume tonight. Today is Wednesday. only wednesday. dear lord it's only wednesday.