Sunday, November 30, 2008

coming to you live from dialup internet in PEI.

Saga #2 ends. Saga #1 continues.

Here’s the biggest surprise of 2008. Brian Burke is the new General Manager of the Toronto Maple Leafs. (Can you feel the sarcasm?)

Now, since this is such a big surprise, nobody’s been really talking about it for months and months. This, of course, means every possible angle of his tenure has not been talked about by every sports analyst in the country.

So this all means that I have a lot to say about this.

It's funny, saga #2 has resolved itself and yet Saga #1 is still going. Mats Sundin “says” he’ll be back in December. (Tomorrow is December). But he also said he’d make a decision by Aug 1. Soooo, don’t hold your breath.

Favourite quote of the week:

“The opposition has every right to bring down the government. But Stephane Dion has no right to take power without going to the people.”

Is Stephen Harper high? The opposition outnumbers the Conservatives.

In fact, I would say that whoever the coalition chooses to lead, they will have more of a right to govern than Stephen Harper. The majority of the country actually voted against him.

Finally some juicy drama out of Ottawa.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Coming to you live from the CBC.

Hey gang.

Sorry about the hiatus, I just started my internship at CBC Radio Charlottetown. My first day was yesterday. Still getting the hang of stuff, they threw me right into working.

I will probably start posting more regularly after I get the hang of this stuff.

I must say that I missed the Canadiens game, but Ryan O'Byrne apparently put the puck into his own net on a delayed penalty. He passed it back to Carey Price, who wasn't actually in the net. That actually tied the game for the Islanders.... and then they won in a shootout. Bill Guerin was credited with the goal.

Gold star, bud. In fact, take a hundred.

Saturday, November 22, 2008


The Senators rolled out their new third sweater today. Barf. This has got to be a joke, right?

It sorta looks like something the Anaheim Mighty Ducks woulda done when they actually officially had the "mighty" in their name.

It just screams Impact Bold, you know that font that was over-used in the 90s...

Now, the entire sweater isn't awful, it's really just the font of the name. I like the black, and the detailing is nice... It actually reminds me of the new Halifax Mooseheads third sweater, which gives that retro feel (even though the team is less than 20 years old). The obvious choice for the Senators would've been to go with their sweaters from back in the day, but the Ottawa 67s (the Major Junior team) uses that design.

So really, if the Sens had've gone with a font closer to the Halifax sweater, it would actually be really nice.

And I wouldn't have to write a blog post titled, "Puke".

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Time for our Thursday, random duthie-isms.

I don’t believe Ottawa ever had a good shot at signing Mats Sundin, but with every loss, you can add another zero after the decimal point on their odds (.00001% and fading)

As you may have heard, Claude Lemieux, he former most hated player in hockey, is making a comeback attempt at age 43.   He has signed with the Sharks.  Sadly for Claude, that would be the China Sharks of the Asia League of Ice Hockey.  Somewhere, Kris Draper is enjoying a long evil laugh.

I think it’s time for some old-school foaming-at-the-mouth-chucking-stuff-around-the-dressing-room Mike Keenan.  I miss him. 

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Saga #1 and Saga #2 collide.

I was just watching That's Hockey on TSN. And both sagas were mentioned in one Perfect Saga Storm.


It appears Mats Sundin is thinking about a mid-December return.

"Mats is currently training daily with the intention to return," Sundin's agent, J.P. Barry said. "He may still decide not to play, however, if his training regimen doesn't produce the results he expects."

So he might think about making a mid-December return.


The Toronto Maple Leafs' ownership group is expected to officially initiate contract negotiations with Brian Burke very soon.

I think this is a bad call for Toronto. I just don't know why yet.

Sometimes even if you think it's a good idea, you shouldn't do it.

Did this just happen? Is it real? Can I touch it?

My god. Someone lost their mind when they thought this would be a good idea. And my theory that every idea goes through at least seven people before it makes it to the general public is definitely in play here. What seven people were like, Slapshot 3? Great idea.

I mean, slapshot 2 was sacrilegious enough. But to make a third one.... I can't even talk about it. Next Question.


pfft. who needs it when you have electronic ballot stuffers...

"Forwards Alex Kovalev, Saku Koivu and Alex Tanguay, defencemen Andrei Markov and Mike Komisarek and goalie Carey Price are not merely leading every other player in their Eastern Conference categories. They are ahead by ridiculous margins, their monstrous numbers fuelled by computer-vote programs written to carpet-bomb, around the clock, for all six at once.

As of Sunday early afternoon, four days into balloting, Kovalev, Koivu and Tanguay had vote totals in the 190,000 range. The next closest forward, Pittsburgh's Sidney Crosby, was approaching 84,000"

That does explain it. I was extremely surprised to see the margins. I wouldn't say many of the Canadiens have had allstar-worthy performances thus far. But then again... Sidney Crosby has six goals in 18 games and he's behind the Montreal forwards...

Magic Mittens.

Kyle Wellwood just scored the nicest goal i've seen in a while. I believe that Gord Miller just said he had "magic mittens". Remember when Toronto put him on waivers? good call guys. as usual.

Also, when checking Wellwood's wikipedia entry, i found this gem: "As of November 2008, Wellwood is currently on a 121 game streak without taking a penalty, which is by far the longest active clean-streak. His last penalty was taken on April 10, 2006."

"How do you spell intimidation? L - U - O - N - G - O." - Pierre McGuire.

my favourite thing.

My favourite thing is when it snows. but it's like sort of raining. And then it's like super windy. Oh.... it's also really cool that I have to walk past the Halifax Common, which is a large open space. It's not windy at all there...... yeah.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Soul Searching.

Kovalev weaved his magic touch last night to win the game with the final shootout goal. 

Montreal shouldn't be going to a shootout with the St. Louis Blues. 

I can see the small vein in the side of Guy Carbonneau's neck beginning to pulsate everytime he hears the announcers say that the Canadiens powerplay is running 0 for 18. 

Yes. The top powerplay in the NHL for the past few years is 0 for 18. One of the main problems is the man himself: Kovalev. They need to stop trying to carry the puck into the zone. Dump, chase to the corner and then start your magical passing. Seriously, if you chase, you will win. You're fast. 
You can't very well put the puck on net if you can't even get into the zone and control it for a few seconds. 

Now, in my humble opinion, a second way to score is to look where your passing. I know, I know... this is outrageous...but trust me. Before you step on the ice, look down. What colour sweater do you have? Make sure you remember that. You seem to be forgetting. A lot.

The Canadiens have until tomorrow night to get their act together when they visit the Carolina Hurricanes. 

Saturday, November 15, 2008


I've seen Montreal play better.

They played the Philadelphia Flyers tonight. The final, 2-1, was much closer than the play actually was. Montreal forgot how to do that thing where the puck leaves one stick and ends up on the other.

The ice did seem abnormally bouncy, which puts a fast skating, passing team like Montreal at a disadvantage to a team that basically tries to skate directly through you. But nonetheless, much of the time it looked like the Flyers had a powerplay.

Alex Tanguay finally got the goal for the Canadiens, but not until midway through the third period. And they couldn't muster up much in the final half of the third to tie it, even with a man advantage with a few minutes left.

Mike Komisarek is out with a shoulder injury from the fight with Lucic on Thursday. There was a fight tonight, and it's the only thing Montreal won. Georges Laraque taught Josh Gratton a thing or two about fighting.

But if you're a Montreal fan and you're feeling sad, just think, you could be a Senators fan.

On Tuesday, after losing 5-0 to the Canadiens, I remember the TSN announcers saying, "well the good thing is, the Senators now have a home and home with the Islanders."

piece of cake, right?

Wrong. The Senators lost tonight, and they lost on Thursday. To the Islanders. I won't say anything else.

Don't worry Senators fans, I realize you need cheering up as well. Toronto lost to Vancouver 4-2. And here's a few duthie-isms from the Hall of Fame induction ceremony:

9:50—Post-show party. A guy asks me (and many others) to sign his dress shirt. I have two thoughts on this:
1. I hope it came from Winners and not Hugo Boss.
2. Why do women never ask me to do these things?

10:37—I am eating tofu (the buffet was bare) with Steve Yzerman, talking about women’s lacrosse.
My world is a strange, wonderful place.

Saga #2

Friday, November 14, 2008

And that just happened.

Melrose out as coach of Lightning.

And that just happened?

Rick Tocchet takes over as interim head coach.

cuz that's a lot better.

When it rains it pours in the NHL.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Remember when...

...Toronto was like looking for a General Manager, and they were allegedly courting Brian Burke, and they were getting in all kinds of trouble because, he was like, already in this contract with Anaheim, and you're not supposed to be all up in the grill of a guy when he's already under contract with another team...because it's sorta like cheating on your significant other with like, their best friend... and he was all like, noooo I love it in Anaheim I would never leave here.... it's like a family.... Toronto? no no. great opportunity but... not for me.


Burke is done in Anaheim. Yup mid-season divorce. Loving it now? Probs not, Burke is lovin this less than a fried chicken head in his McNuggets.

"This was the hardest decision I've ever had to make," he said. "I'm comforted that the team is in great hands with Bob and [assistant GM] David [McNab] in charge. I can't thank everyone enough for their understanding and patience as I wrestled with this decision."

Sighh... and so opens ongoing saga #2: The bidding battle for Brian Burke. In mid-season. And Toronto is involved. Therefore the Toronto media. Which includes Michael Lansberg on Off the Record. Seriously just hit me over the head and pass me the bottle of scotch right now.

(just for the record, saga #1 would be Mats Sundin, but will be continued to be known simply as, the sundin saga.)

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Remembrance Day.

Canadians in Passchedaele.

Canadian soldier lays a wreath in Afghanistan.

Tomb of the unknown soldier in Ottawa.

Tomb of the unknown soldier, with the national war memorial behind (ottawa).

Vimy Ridge memorial. A tiny piece of Canadian land in France.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

I can't even talk about this weekend.

Habs take 1 point out of a possible 4. yay.

Great job guys. Good penalty killing.

But it's not completely your fault. Good job NHL Schedulers... does Montreal get another week off for the third time in a row? You're spreading Kovalev's magic thin. It only works when he gets to play often. It keeps the magic warm.

The NHL scheduling team is killing Kovalev's magic.

Which is basically the same as a buzz kill.

Nobody wants to be a buzz kill.

Also it appears that Killer Kostopoulos will have his hit on Toronto's Mike Van Ryn looked at by the NHL. Van Ryn has a concussion and bled all over the ice. Killer Kostopoulos was ejected from the game.

And Jesus, Price (see the comma makes a big difference... take it out and it's Jesus Price, which is what I put for my religious views on facebook.) maybe you should go back to eating burgers and chocolate bars late at night... it seemed to work for you before.

And now for the wacky picture of the day...

This just looks plain crazy.

Thursday, November 6, 2008


I'm glad that I'm not the only one who couldn't possibly ignore the election. 

-I do love the wall of eight monitors we have in our studio. It’s hockey fan porn. Though it can get confusing. At one point Tuesday night, I got my fancy election graphics confused with my NHL Scoreboard and briefly believed Mike Fisher had been elected Senator of North Dakota.

-Does this mean Sarah Palin has been waived? Will we now see her dropping the puck in the East Coast Hockey League?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


Excuse me while I don't blog about hockey for yet another day.

But last night was history.

It's the polar opposite feeling to the one four years ago.

I spent my night twisting through Halifax's downtown, checking out different election parties for a story.

This is one of those things that people will remember where they were when Barack Obama became the President.

I was standing in the Nova Scotia Sport Hall of Fame. Sidney Crosby's dryer was covered in empty drink glasses. There was a giant projection screen showing the results.

And I was amongst the black community in Halifax.

It was amazing.

Truly amazing.

They were so happy, joyful, tearful, jubilant.... relieved.

I had people telling me, that they never thought they'd see it happen in their lifetime.

People were in tears, and hugging, and just plain screaming. I had goosebumps.

So I leave you today with the story that came from that:

Sunday, November 2, 2008

No lead is safe.

Last night I was chatting online with a friend about the upcoming Canadiens game. The main concern was about Alexei Kovalev and Tomas Plekanec... and they're lack of doing anything this year. I personally blame the fact that Kovalev cut off his magical mullet.

We'll get back to that. First onto the game.

Quickly after my conversation about how I was worried about Kovalev, he scored 2 minutes into the game.

Annnnd then Mark Streit came back to haunt the Canadiens with a bullet from the point that deflected off of a Canadiens player and into the top corner. Oh Mark, we used to be friends... but something's changed. (Oh... it's the jersey. Right.)

Suddenly nearing the end of the second period and it's 4-1 Islanders. What the shhh... *click*

that was the sound of me changing the channel to the Pittsburgh game.

So the Penguins were playing the lowly Blues. The Penguins appeared to have quite a lot of jump in their step. But, whatever happened to Sidney Crosby did not look so good. He was expected to possibly miss last nights game due to an "undisclosed injury" but he took to the ice anyways. It looks like he has back spasms or something like that. Several times I saw him skate to the bench and I figured he wasn't going to come back on. Yet somehow he managed to get 2 assists.

This game started an hour later than the Montreal game so I was actually watching the first period of the game. Satan scored late in the first to make it 1-0 Penguins.

Ok. Ok. I feel bad... back to the Canadiens sinking ship, er, game.


Start of the Third period and the Canadiens are down 4-1. Oh boy. Smelling a comeback? It's the Islanders... it could be done.

The Canadiens actually do look very good in the third period. They're dominating the play, and buzzing around the Islanders net.

And then our dead man skating emerges. Tomas Plekanec scores two goals in two minutes. At this point, i've spilled chips all over the floor and i'm standing in front of the television clutching my last Propeller Pumpkin beer. The Islanders have already called their timeout after Plekanec scored his first goal, so that obviously worked really well.

Another four minutes and another goal. Chris Higgins puts one behind Yann Danis at 14:06 of the third period to tie the game 4-4.

You've got to be kidding me.

A little more than a minute later at 15:19, Kovelev returns from the dead. I mean sure he scored back in the first period. But midway through the game he took a high stick from noone other than former teammate Mark Streit. So he's got this bleeding gash on his cheek. This is just plain hilarious.

I kinda feel bad for Bill Guerin. He looks really depressed. I suppose I would be too, if I played on the Islanders.

The moral of this story. The Canadiens only have to play one period.

The other stuff.

The goalies are dropping like flies. Rick DiPietro is out 4-6 weeks because of knee surgery. And Martin Brodeur left the game last night with an elbow injury. Broduer was probably cursed since Hockey Night in Canada did a feature peice on him and how he's destined to break Patrick Roy's record.

The Toronto Maple Leafs scored five, COUNTEM, five third period goals to win 5-2 over the New York Rangers.

And Ottawa cannot seem to find it. They are sitting 12th in the standings after a shootout loss last night to the Tampa Bay Lightening. Good God, Tampa Bay??

And lastly i'd like to point out this craziness that is called weather in Halifax. Snow one day, 14 degrees the next:


I will post about the amazing come from behind victories of both Montreal and Toronto. But I haven't been able to gather my thoughts. So in the meantime... Duthie-isms.


"11:12pm—As I write this blog, I contemplate whether I should name the cable company that is so smart, it doesn’t offer NHL Centre Ice. I decide that would be small and petty.

11:13pm—I change my mind. Aurora Cable. AURORA Cable. A-U-R-O-R-A C-A-B-L-E.

11:15pm—I feel better."


-The following story requires no punch line. It stands alone. A nugget of information so glorious, so satisfying, the joy of it may just get me through the entire winter.

On November 6th, the country of Albania will bestow its highest honour on two native sons: Tie Domi and Jim Belushi. It was previously given to Mother Theresa. Domi...Belush...Theresa.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Extreme drunk driving.


A woman in Kingsville, Ont., has learned you don't have to be navigating a road to be charged with impaired driving.

The woman, 34, was arrested Thursday night after witnesses told police she was driving a Zamboni erratically at a local arena.

They said the ice-resurfacing machine struck the rink boards and missed sections of the ice.

At one point, witnesses reported the driver stopped on the ice and was slumped over the wheel.

The driver, who was described by police as being unco-operative, was arrested after guiding the machine off the ice surface.

The accused is due to appear in court in December on charges of impaired driving and having a blood alcohol level over the legal limit.