Dear Ottawa #%$^$ Senators,

You've failed. You're driving me nuts. We gave you a simple task: to continue on your craptacular spiral into last place. And you couldn't even complete it.

Throwing-in-towel Fail.

Foligno, you're fired. Jason Spezza, definitely fired. Jarko Ruutu, fired. Alfredsson, so totally fired.

Ok, then there's the MATH FAIL.

Ottawa head coach Cory Clouston, who since taking over from fired Sens coach Craig Hartsburg Feb. 2 has a 13-6-3 record said: "We feel we're a playoff team."

epic math fail.

Oh, eff it. You're all fired. Someone call up the Binghamton Senators, i think they're the only ones up for the task. Or actually, you can borrow some of the Canadiens, they seem to be fairly good at NOT WINNING. Oh and fire Clouston and bring back Harsburg.

full of hateful, hateful, anger,
Jenn



Speaking of the Canadiens...

Hooray for meltdowns.


Remember when the Habs fired their coach and that was supposed to fix everything? That went really well.

PJ Stock had a rather endearing blog post about Carbonneau and the debacle that is the Canadiens dressing room right now.

The best part of it all.... This fantastically terrible meltdown season is going to be immortalized in a loonie.


oh yay. I can't wait to think about this season 15 years from now when i'm digging in my pocket for timmies money.


Moving on to more interesting things.


A Haligonian is coaching hockey on the international level.

Patrick MacDonald is coaching with hockey powerhouse, Malaysia.

This is the second year for the IIHF Challenge Cup of Asia. The Chinese Taipei National Team won the inaugural tourney.

I am mystified by this. I heard the story of Patrick MacDonald on CBC Information Morning while still in a tired stupor at about 8:30 this morning. I actually thought I had dreamt it. Challenge Cup of Asia. Totally sounds fake.


Ovechkin.



Talk about blowing something out of proportion. The kid just scored 50 goals. Did you score 50 goals? Did anyone else score 50 goals? People are acting like he kicked a baby or something.

Tight race in the East.

The Islanders are atop the standings — just barely. But they've won their last two games, whereas the Lightening who have equal amounts of games left are on a fantastic losing streak — they're really bringing it.

But the big story in this cluster-eff is the Atlanta "giant killers" Thrashers. They beat Montreal and then Calgary this past week.

They are seriously dropping the ball here. If the sport Extreme Ball Dropping existed, this would be it.

They're actually in danger of falling behind the Ottawa Senators, who have been shaky recently with two wins.

But despite the recent lack of determination by the Senators (and unluckily for the Thrashers), the Senators have two games at hand to completely get destroyed in. They also have two games left against Toronto — and the chances are good the Senators will prevail and lose both, since the Leafs are late-season choke artists, and always seem to win down the stretch.

Look out Atlanta, you're in dangerous territory here. You better get your act together.

Sometimes I worry about people...

...and what goes through their heads when they sit down to write an article...

From NHL.com:

Anyone wondering what Sidney Crosby would do for a midwinter encore 12 months "after scoring the winning shootout goal in the inaugural Winter Classic now has their answer. At noon ET today, Crosby eclipsed Jaromir Jagr’s record for the most votes ever received by one player in one season in the history of NHL All-Star Game fan balloting.

Apparently Sidney Crosby has done nothing since scoring that single goal in that one game back in January 2008.

He didn't lead his team to the Stanley Cup finals at age 20. He didn't get inducted into the Order of Nova Scotia. And he absolutely doesn't have 46 points, second only to teammate Evgeni Malkin.

So yes. Obviously surpassing Jagr in allstar fan voting is the obvious encore to that goal he scored outside. Obviously.

Not to mention that it is obviously extremely fair to compare Jagr's time with Crosby's. Online balloting has been around for years and the NHL hasn't had a ballot stuffing problem.

Question, what will Crosby do next?

Answer, if he keeps this up, he might even crack the olympic lineup.

Note: may contain peanuts... er, sarcasm.